This trip is different from last year.  I mean, it’s the same family and same RV, but entirely different kind of trip.  Last year we spent a good part of the time on the road, seeing the sights from America’s highways.  In other words, there was A LOT of driving.  Coincidentally, there was also a lot of screaming from our precious son who did not appreciate sitting in a car seat for that amount of time.  So in the interest of keeping our family together and not leaving Roark somewhere in Tennessee, we decided to make this trip more about the locations rather than the road, which is nice because we get to hang our hats (or park our rig) in a spot for more than one night at a time.

 We spent the first several nights in Natural Springs, Virginia.  I know I’ve already told you about all there is to do when it’s raining, but when the weather’s cooperative, the fun really begins. 

 The first thing on our to-do list was the Virginia Safari Park.  And as much as I would like to tell you that this stop was completely for the kids that would only be a half truth.  I really planned this with myself in mind and thought the kids wouldn’t mind tagging along. 

 The only thing I knew about safari parks before last Wednesday was what I had learned from watching clips on America’s Funniest Home Videos.  I always thought it looked like a good time and something I needed to experience someday.  I was not disappointed.

 When we first arrived, we visited their walk-thru area which was kind of like a small zoo.  I was really impressed with the amount of animals that were just in this part including tigers, giraffes, and monkeys.  The animal habitats were so nice, but yet you could actually see the animals.  I’ve always defended the Birmingham Zoo, but maybe everyone is right.  Maybe it really is kind of crummy.

 On a side note, I will now start referring to Roarkie’s hair color as “straw colored blonde.”  As he was standing next to one of the pens watching goats eat some hay, a camel came up and tried to eat his hair.  Ken was rolling the camera, but dropped it in response to my yelling that a camel was eating Roark’s head.  I feel pretty sure that we could have made an appearance on AFV ourselves had the camera still been rolling.

 Anyway, the highlight of the walk-thru area was the kangaroo walk-about.  The sign on the fence literally said, “Please step over sleeping kangaroos.”  We actually got to pet a kangaroo that was lying in the middle of the trail.  Some of them were a bit skittish, but I would probably run too if I were a kangaroo and saw two little kids running up to me with their hands out.

 After we had seen everything in the walk-thru area, it was time to begin the real fun.  We loaded back into the car. (No, we didn’t try this in the motor home.)  Ken drove while Edie sat in the passenger seat, and I sat behind her in the back with Roarkie.   We had four buckets of feed. 

 We didn’t even get through the gate before a pack of llamas were at our car windows.  In fact, several were standing in front of the car, making it impossible to drive.  We eventually inched our way through the gate, and I had my bucket out the window ready for action.  Within the first couple of minutes, we had llamas sticking their heads in the car, trying to get the buckets.  Ken and I were laughing hysterically.  Edie was screaming as she crouched down in the floorboard, and Roarkie was telling them to get “OUT!”

 I must admit, the ostriches freaked me out.  They pecked at my bucket with force and then threw their heads back to swallow the mouthful of feed in one gulp.   Something about it was unsettling.  I guess because I had a birds eye view (pun intended), and I quickly decided that I was going to stay away from them.  

 The camels were definitely the most aggressive which is probably why they were behind a fence.  We were about to pass them by without feeding them until I decided to give it a try.  The sign on the fence said, “Careful.  We steal buckets.”  I now have a bruise on my arm the size of a half dollar that can attest to the sign’s truthfulness. 

 That camel nearly pulled my arm out of socket trying to wrestle that bucket out of my hand.  I finally relinquished it when my arm got penned in the window that was only half-way down.  The whole spectacle was only about seven seconds and ended with me howling in the back seat, holding my arm.  I’m sad to say, I let the camel beat me, but he had an advantage.  He was willing to resort to physical pain, and I wasn’t.

 So from there, we wound around through more pastures and fields, feeding different types of elk and deer.  Edie eventually worked up the nerve to hang out the window and hold her bucket out.  I nicknamed her the “Feed Nazi” because she would let a deer get a bite of food, and then quickly shoo him away while saying, “That’s enough for you!” 

 Since Ken’s window didn’t roll down, he played tricks on the animals by placing buckets of food on the dashboard.  The animals would hang across the windshield and drool as we all laughed.   (Don’t worry, Dad.  We’ll wash the car before we bring it back to you.)

 By the end of our safari adventure, we had four empty buckets, one wound, and some great memories.   Later that night, Ken and I watched the video footage and were still laughing at the spectacle of it all. 

 The next day, we toured the Natural Bridge of Natural Bridge, Virginia, and in a nut shell, it’s just another tourist trap.  It was cool to see where George Washington had carved his initials in the side of the rock while he was surveying in his pre-military days, but honestly, we didn’t even know that was what it was until we went through the second-rate wax museum (admission included with our ticket).  Natural Bridge wasn’t really worth the stop, but it was forgotten because the Safari Park was so much fun.

I’m worn out from pushing a stroller all day.  I spent the afternoon wrangling kids in a gift shop, and I paid way too much for a mediocre lunch.  It can only mean one thing: the McKibben’s are on vacation!

 I have now learned from experience that every vacation we take in the future we will be departing on a Saturday.  My original plan was to leave on Tuesday, but as soon as Ken got off work on Friday, he put his vacation shorts on, dug his flip flops out of the closet, and said, “Let’s go!”  I spent the next day and a half slinging clothes into laundry baskets and shuttling stuff between our house and the motor home.  I didn’t stop for 18 hours straight, but I turned three days of packing into one.  We finally pulled out of the driveway on Sunday afternoon, and it was a good thing because after all that packing, I really needed a vacation.

 Our first destination was to Natural Bridge, Virginia, or to be more precise, Jellystone Park in Natural Bridge, Virginia.  The internet made it look like a kid’s paradise and the best campground in the world, but from what I can tell, it’s basically a normal campground with a slash pad, inflatable bouncing pad, and Yogi Bear’s picture plastered on anything that will stand still.

 However, as far as Edie’s concerned, it is, in fact, the best campground in the world.  She is especially a fan of the times Yogi Bear himself has come by our campsite for a hug.  Two days ago, she’d never even heard of him, but I guess she thinks he must be pretty famous since she’s been seeing his picture everywhere lately.

 There is a fair amount to do in this little area provided you have good weather.  I can say for a fact that there is absolutely NOTHING to do here if you don’t.  In hindsight, I might not have busted my butt to get us out of the house early if I had known that we would just be spending the extra day cooped up in the RV due to rain.

 It started raining first thing in the morning while we were saying the pledge of allegiance with Yogi Bear.  We immediately began searching the internet for something to do indoors since all of our planned activities needed sunshine and quickly realized that we were grasping at straws.  Our first day of vacation consisted of lunch at Burger King, and a stop by Radio Shack and the Dollar Store. 

 By evening the rain had not let up.  So onto the next plan:  the movies.  However, even that seemed somewhat impossible.  According to Fandango, the nearest movie theater was over an hour away.  I kept searching and coming up with nothing.  I could feel the RV walls moving in on me.  Edie was whiney.  Roark was getting into everything, and I was quickly losing it.  I told Ken, “I don’t care what we do, but we’ve got to get out of this RV!”

 So Ken set down in front of the computer and began to work his magic.  Five minutes later, he was telling everyone to get their shoes on.  He had found a little theater showing the Beesus and Ramona movie about fifteen minutes away, and it was starting in ten minutes. 

 I can’t imagine a more perfect movie theater for our purpose.  First, when I was buying our tickets, the young girl behind the counter told me that Tuesday was “Family Night,” so right there I could feel our luck changing.  Second, we were the only people there, and I mean, in the ENTIRE theater.  As in, we were the only people that patronized the establishment that whole evening.  This was great because Roark could run the aisles once he was bored with the movie and no one would care.  They actually waited until we took our seats to begin the show.

 Now to really appreciate this scene, you have to remember what we do for a living.  Ken has worked in some of the finest movie theaters in the country, and we are proud to boast that some of them are even our clients.  So when a third of the movie was being projected onto the curtains and there wasn’t even a sub in the speakers, we just looked at each other and laughed.  We drove nine hours to watch Ramona Quimby in a two bit theater.  The scene was priceless. 

 It was really a cute movie.  I had secretly wanted to see it since Beverly Cleary was one of my favorite children’s authors.  So it worked out because I didn’t really see Ken allowing me to add it to our Netflix queue.  There were even several funny parts where we all laughed out loud.  But the best moment was when the train went by outside and was so loud I thought the stained ceiling tiles were going to fall down on our heads. 

 We all had popcorn for dinner and bladder-busting-sized cokes, and during the credits, the kids and I danced in the aisles just because we could.   Once again, Daddy saved the day, and whenever I think of that movie, I will always remember that night in Virginia where we got to enjoy our own private showing.

My kids have a new obsession as of late, and although it’s a good habit I should be encouraging, I can’t really seem to get behind it.  Both children go nuts over brushing their teeth.  Now, I know it sounds crazy that I’m not doing a little happy dance over their good oral hygiene, but to tell you the truth, our morning teeth brushing ritual has become one of my least favorite parts of the day.

It all began about a week ago when Edie discovered some of those toothpick flossers in her father’s bathroom drawer.   I was in the bathtub when she came running in.  “Mommy, look what I found,” she says while holding the flosser in the air like it was the Olympic torch or something.

“Um-hum…” not really sharing in her excitement.

“Now I can floss my teeth EVERYDAY!”  She begins rummaging through my bathroom cabinets.  ”Mommy, where’s my wash mouth?” she asks with her head deep under the bathroom sink, flosser still in hand.

“You’re what?”  I ask back, knowing full well that she means to say “mouthwash”, but can’t pass up a chance to hear her say it wrong again.

“My wash mouth!  The blue stuff that shows the sugar bugs on my teeth!” she says frustrated at this point, not understanding why I’m grinning at her from ear to ear.

“Next to my lotion.” And so began the obsession.  Now every morning she brushes, flosses, and rinses.  And then when she’s finished with that, she does it all over again. 

And then after I’ve told her for the fifth time to wrap it up, I have the lovely job of being teeth inspector which involves the biggest, toothiest smile she can possibly smile, and then I ooo and aww over what clean teeth she has. 

Now if this where the only part of the ritual, I would probably be a bit more supportive, but as always, Roarkie has a way of making tasks more difficult.  In that the whole time Edie is cleaning every crevice in her mouth, Roark is trying to push her off the stool to get to the sink because after all, monkey see, monkey do, right? 

And Roark’s idea of brushing his teeth is basically chewing on any toothbrush he can get his hands on and then trying to eat the toothpaste from the tube.  Now he has his own toothbrush, and even though I have repeatedly told him that it’s nasty to use someone else’s, he doesn’t really seem to care.

So while I’m trying to get ready and put my make-up on, Edie’s yelling at Roark to give her back her toothbrush, and Roark is fussing at Edie because he can’t reach the water.  Then Edie pushes him off the stool, and he cries and takes off running with the toothpaste.  It’s fifteen minutes of complete chaos in a five by five space, and ends with me swearing that I’m going to lose it if they don’t get out of the bathroom!

I guess I’m suppose to look on the bright side of things, and that’s that my children want to brush their teeth. And truthfully, this really is quite timely since I absentmindedly canceled our dental insurance about two months ago and can’t reapply until next January.  I guess that’s the real kicker here.  I can’t very well discourage them to stop brushing, now can I?  Then what kind of mother would I be?!

So I guess in the mean time, I will just have to grin and bear it.  Now if only I could find someone to inspect my smile and ooo and aww at how good my teeth look, that might be a little easier to do.

Don’t be fooled by his adorable expression.  He’s on my list this morning.  Somewhere in my house is a cordless phone that’s off the hook, and only Roarkie knows where he’s put it.  I’ve spent the entire morning looking in cabinets and under beds, all the while acting put out and mumbling ugly things under my breath.  And he just follows me around looking adorable.  It’s his only weapon, and he has become a master at knowing how to use it.

I really hate it when someone tells you that they’re struggling with something, but yet, won’t give you any details as to what it is.  They just want your sympathy.

It bothers me not because I’m nosy and want to hear all the juicy details of their problems, and then feel better about my mundane life.   I like to think that it’s more because I’m a caring individual and want to lend a hand to help, and when you give me no details, I can’t help.  Ok, so maybe it’s a little from column A and a little from column B…but mostly B.  I promise.

So all of that to say, I am struggling with something in my life and I can’t write about any details.  I just need your sympathy.

I’m halfway kidding.  The truth is these past few weeks have been emotional in our house with lots of ups and downs and me on the verge of tears and not being able to control it.  Sounds fun, doesn’t it?

In short, our business is feeling the effects of this crummy economy.  We’ve had a lot of changes over the summer, and we’ve had to let some good guys go.  And that makes me sad.  Really sad.

Last week was particularly tough for me because I was about to lose my accounting clerk.  I already feel like there aren’t enough hours in the day to do my job at work with also trying to manage the kids, house, and all that goes with them.  So when I would begin to think about doing my job plus his, along with the kids, house, and everything else, I could feel this panic slowly start to rise within me.  I didn’t know how I was physically going to get it all done.  I didn’t know where my kids were going to go while I was working more hours, and I didn’t know how long this was going to be the situation.  Six months, a year, two years?!

So I did what most females would do under pressure.  I broke down and had a good cry.  I cried for the guys that were already gone.  I cried for the uncertainty of the coming months.  I just let it flow.  I finally admitted I was fooling myself, that I couldn’t do it all, and that we needed another plan.

I started out last week concerned because I was going to be working more, and turns out, I will now be working less.  I’m not completely gone from MediaMerge, but we decided to cut my hours back considerably (along with my paycheck).  I felt a huge weight lifting off my shoulders with this decision, and I am so relieved that we found a way for our accounting clerk to stay with us.  I really couldn’t stand the thought of him joining so many other Americans on the unemployment line.

I try not to use this blog as a place I come to dump about all the things I am unhappy with in my life. When I read about our adventures, I want to remember the good moments and let the not-so-good ones fade away.  I think that’s why I haven’t posted much this summer.  Not because we haven’t had some great adventures, but because I’ve had a hard time seeing them through this the dark cloud that I can’t seem to shake.

I want to believe that the worst is behind us.  I mean, Ken already does.  He’s much better at being a cheerleader than I am.  I have more of a tendency to mope around like Eeyore until I can shake myself out of it.  

Although, my new work schedule has helped me have a better outlook about the upcoming months.  I am excited that I will have more time to spend with my kids and get to participate in some of the fun things that we couldn’t before because of my work schedule.  And as of last Saturday, I am officially a home-schooling mother.  In that, I have pulled Edie out of preschool and registered with a home-school cover school in our area.  We are already scheduled for some of those fun home-school field trips I’ve always heard about. 

We’re going to be okay.  I have no doubt.  God has provided for us up to this point, and I believe that He will continue to do so.  Even in the midst of my crummy week, I was overwelmed by my friends willingness to help, encouraging emails and texts, and even the response with wanting to help with my kids. 

In fact, Edie asked me the other day, “Mommy, are we rich?”

I couldn’t help but think about our current situation, our friends, our little family, and said, “Honey, more than you can comprehend.”

It was one of those rare occasions when they were within arms’ reach of each other and Roark wasn’t trying to hit her upside the head and Edie didn’t have him in a choke-hold, wrestling him to the ground.  I thought the moment warranted a picture.

So we spent this past weekend becoming one with nature in the great outdoors.  We were really roughing it this trip since we had no cable or Internet.  Looking back, I’m not sure how we survived.

I’m going to let you in on a little secret.  My idea of camping is having all the comforts of home, just in miniature size.  When we travel in the RV, I still have a working kitchen with a sink, stove, and microwave.  Well, maybe its only working if I’m in it, but you get the idea.  We’ve got a teeny tiny bathroom and shower.  The only thing that’s not miniature-sized are the three TVs.   So when I use the word “camping”, pretend I’m winking at you when I say it because let’s face it, it’s not really camping.  I know this, and I have no shame when I confess that the RV even has a washer and dryer.  Now if Ken could just find some space for a little dishwasher and rig up a Tivo box, there would be no reason to ever come home again…well, we would probably have to let my parents use it every once in awhile since you know, it is theirs, but otherwise, we could travel all the time with all the amenities of home just minus that pesky extra space.

We took the motor-home to Tannehill State Park as a trial run before we head out for our big summer vacation in a month.  This year we are headed north again, but only as far as Washington D.C.  I know taking two small children to our nation’s capitol will be a complete waste on them, and I fully intend to take them again when they are older and can appreciate it.  However, there is another rally being held there at the end of August, and we decided to just incorporate it into our family vacation.

It’s gusty, I know, and I am already making plans on how I am going to keep up with the children in the crowd.  Since Ken won’t let me buy some of those kid leashes, I’m having to get creative.  I think I’m going to tell Edie that if she lets go of my hand even once during the entire day, she will never get to watch another princess movie ever again, or even say the word “princess” for the rest of her life.  And for Roarkie, I’m either going to implant him with some sort of tracking device or just duct tape him into the stroller.  I haven’t decided yet.  Either way, we’re going to have a great time!

In the past four years, I’ve made a lot of poor parenting decisions.  I admit it.  In fact, my motto for the first couple of years was, “Gimme a break! I’m just wingin’ here, kid.”  I don’t always know what I’m doing, and I’ll be the first to confess that sometimes there is absolutely no logic behind some of my decisions.  However, every once in a while, I get something right, and sometimes it’s when I’m not even trying.  Take Tivo, for example.  One of the best parenting decisions Ken and I ever made, and we weren’t even doing it for the kids.  In fact, it was a birthday present to me from Ken before we even had kids, but man, has it paid for itself several times over.

To begin with, we don’t have to own a lot of kid movies.  I just record them off the TV and bring then up with the touch of button.  Awesome.  Plus, if Edie’s really in a Charlie and Lola phase, then I can record that as well to have on hand in a pinch.  But my favorite thing about Tivo (in relation to the children, that is) is that Edie doesn’t watch commercials.  In fact, I think she has seen about two in her whole life.  Ok, maybe that’s a bit stretching it, maybe three.  If her show even begins to start to break to commercial, you can bet in the next second she is going to yell out, “Can someone turn my show back on?!”  Which on a side note, completely baffles me because she will say this while I am sitting on the couch RIGHT NEXT to her and she’ll be looking directly at me.

“Yea, sure, someone can,” I’ll say real sarcastic back to her because, you know, four-year-olds totally get sarcasm.

Anyway, back to my main point, the kid never watches commercials.  She has no idea of the toys that she’s been missing out on because she’s so impatient during commercial breaks.  There is a whole world out there just waiting to advertise to her if she will just give them the chance.

There have been a couple of times I was slow on the draw and didn’t get to the fast forward button in time.  It seems like every commercial she sees, she then declares afterward that she MUST have what they are selling.  Again, just another way that Tivo has paid for itself.

Well, the other week, we were in a similar scenario, and either I didn’t hear the request for “someone” to fast forward or I was messing around on the computer and tuning it out.  (Don’t act like you don’t do the same thing with your kids!) Either way, Edie saw a commercial, and within seconds, she was running in asking if I would buy her a Butterfly Garden.  Seeing a chance to teach her a life lesson, I said, “No.  I’m not going to buy you a Butterfly Garden, but if you earn the first $15 dollars of it, I will pay the rest.”  Let’s face it, that’s more money than she has ever seen in her whole life, and I really thought she might get that Butterfly Garden sometime around her eighth birthday.  But I momentarily forgot that she is a product of Ken McKibben.

She washed every dish she could get her hands on, and she hosted another lemonade stand.  She picked up leaves in the front yard after her father trimmed the shrubs, and she even straightened her brother’s room for a quarter (which took a lot of pride swallowing since she didn’t make the mess).  She was not above asking family members to donate to her cause, but don’t worry, I always followed up that she needed a chore to perform before she could take their money.  And she scrubbed the bathroom mirrors at the first sight of smudges.

It only took her two weeks before she had saved enough to meet her end of the bargain, and so, I made good on my promise.

Edie is now the mother of four hungry caterpillars.  She spends a large part of her day watching over them and giving us minute by minute updates on their shenanigans.

Running into the kitchen from her bedroom, “Look Mommy!  Arthur is upside down!” or “Shhh!  The caterpillars are all sleeping.”

I wish I could remember all their names, but Edie is asleep right now, so I will have to introduce them all to you later.  But for now, here are the four newest members of our family in all their caterpillar glory:

DAY TWO

Can I just say one thing?  I promise I won’t get all mushy about it, but I can’t post about our July 4th celebration without starting off with this one statement.  I LOVE our country.  I really do.  As Edie would say, I love it to the moon and stars and sunshine.

To celebrate our great nation of freedom this year, Edie participated in a water balloon fight while Ken listened to veterans speak of their service.  We all ate some bar-b-que and corn on the cob.  We said the pledge of allegience and sang the national anthem with thousands of others standing beside us, and then we ended the day of celebration with fireworks in the park, sitting in lawn chairs holding our children in our laps.  Happy Birthday, America!  You know how to throw a great party.